Profil (Moscow) - March 12, 2007

RBC takes high-profile Russians to visit Amsterdam. As usual, meetings of the business conference were highlighted by dinners and parties.

Small watercraft

Can you guess what a few high-ranking Russian guests have to talk about while in a boat on their way to dinner somewhere along the Amstel River? Just a few names here, to get you started: Vice President of TNK-BP Vladimir Ruga, advisor to the economy minister Yury Lyubimov, General Director of the Center for Political Technologies Igor Bunin, Director of the Institute for Globalization Studies Mikhail Delyagin, President of the fund for the support of legislative initiatives Grigory Tomchin, General Director of the Gudok newspaper Vladimir Zmeyushchenko, top manager of Bashkirian Chemistry Abbas Gallyamov, along with a few more dozens of prominent business people. The scene is set in the Netherlands. The prominent figures are sailing quietly through Amsterdam in the evening, admiring the house boats and trying to make as many wishes as possible while passing under a bridge (they were tipped off that several wooden bridges in the city are known for making any wishes made under them come true).

So, Peter I! There is no way to think of Holland without thinking of our two-meter high tsar, who Russians are sure to hear had quite a crush on Dutch beauties, and those beauties reciprocated. Next, Rembrandt! Many passengers were embarrassed to learn that he, and not our contemporary writer Sergei Lukyanenko, was actually the first author of Night Watch. Van Gogh! Well, everything is clear about him: he moved to the south of France, and his landscapes became more colorful and flamboyant.

Hmmm. What else can guests talk about in the Netherlands, looking forward to Carpaccio and the White Merlot 2005 wine? Yes, exactly! Prostitutes. The innumerable streets of the Red Light District. No one can escape that topic in Amsterdam.

On land

The guests finally arrive at the Grand Hotel in Amsterdam's historic center to see the gracefully laid tables, just in time for the welcome dinner. The guests take their seats leisurely: lawyer Natalia Barshchevskaya, Vice President of PIOGlobal Asset Management Olga Issa, Vice President of Renaissance Asset Management Danilo Latsmanovich, publisher Igor Maltsev. All the seats are taken, and many guests are seated rather compactly. The hall accommodates over 250 Russian guests visiting Amsterdam.

Carried away by romantic feelings, we almost forgot to mention that all those reputable guests have come here for a very good reason. Russians have arrived in Amsterdam for an international business conference arranged by RosBusinessConsulting.

Back in the airport, they were hailed by RBC's General Director Yury Rovensky, who graciously offered a selection of Dutch cheeses to taste.

There, Yury was wearing the national Dutch red clogs (or klompen), which are slightly unusual to the Russian eye. And here again we find Yury Rovensky welcoming each and every guest, this time dressed in a more formal suit, though still in the same Dutch clogs. Less conspicuous but equally cordial are other RBC top managers, German Kaplun and Alexander Morgulchik, helping the guests find their seats. After that, Rovensky announces that a large group of business people and officials from Kazakhstan who are new to RBC's conferences is present in the hall. Old-timers at international conferences and cultural programs organized by RBC saluted the Kazakhs, signaling that by entering such a wide "family" they have gained the brightest of prospects.

Meanwhile, the guests have already finished the Beef Carpaccio and started on their halibut. A whisper has swept through the tables about the Dutch herrings, which, legend has it, give you a chance to live over a hundred if you eat ten each day. Discussions on the issues were of an expressly philosophical nature, lacking any practical approach whatsoever: no herring was even served at dinner.

Large watercraft

The next day, the amount of people present grew noticeably. Among the new arrivals was State Duma deputy and ex-banker Alexander Lebedev with a report on cooperation and partnerships between Russia and the EU. Russia's Ambassador to the Netherlands Kirill Gevorgyan also joined the delegates for a cup of coffee during the coffee break, and Deputy Finance Minister Sergei Shatalov could not turn down the traditional hot waffles during the conference's informal break.

And in the evening, the guests once again left their Hotels, the Hilton Amsterdam and Golden Tulip, and mounted a vessel (it is well known that Amsterdam is mostly water with only small patches of land - 99 islands all in all). They decided to relax after a fairly strained debate of whether Russia would become a WTO member or not. This time, they boarded a fairly large ship, the Ocean Diva.

Russians were chatting about the wonderful sunny day drawing to an end, a luxury that they say the Netherlands is afforded only 70 times a year. Among those on deck were head of Audi Russia Oskar Akhmedov, co-owner of Wimm-Bill-Dann Sergei Plastinin (who told Profil that his daughter Kira Plastinina had taken to designing clothes, and that he had opened a chain of stores for her), TV presenter Boris Notkin, co-owners of the insurance company Oranta Sergei and Olga Ustyukov, President of Olma Media Group Vladimir Uzun, Micex top manager Mikhail Temnichenko, and poet and exchange broker Alexander Shulgin, who offered personal congratulations (with hugs and kisses) to each and every lady who stepped on board the ship. On the vessel, they were to take part in a gala dinner celebrating the conference and the international women's holiday, March 8th. All the ladies were treated with reverence. To begin with, they were presented with a few hundred superb bunches of orange tulips and afterwards they were offered a diversion of the famous Russian comedian show Comedy Club. A Dutch businessman sitting next to us asked, "What kind of actors are they? What are their sketches about?" Some of his Russian colleagues explained to him through giggles that their sketches were about sex, drugs, politics and other vicious practices, all of which were enjoying great demand in Russia. Even though his own country boasts no end of democracy, the Dutch national chuckled and asked, "Is this all right, with the ladies present?" He calmed down, however, when he saw for himself that Russians had a queer sense of humor. After that, he tried to infer the message of the sketches from the actors' gestures.

Beef tartare, red and white wines, veal medallions and a selection of Dutch breads were served. Head of the Russian trade mission to the Netherlands Vladmimir Vorobyov said the Netherlands was hugely interested in expanding its ties with Russia, particularly in agriculture, casting a glance towards the tulips that were everywhere on the ship - hundreds, or rather, thousands of them. The conversation about tulips, chrysanthemums and narcissuses was interrupted by a group of Russian business people who were excitedly chatting about their visits to coffee shops, demonstrating a striking familiarity with the pricing policies of local drug dealers. We beg your pardon, it was a slip of the tongue: we are actually referring to state sellers of psilocybin mushrooms, marijuana, and their products. Someone pointed out quite reasonably that cannabis and psilocybin mushrooms represented a significant segment of Dutch agriculture, but that has nothing to do with the Russian-Dutch trade.